A few years ago, scientists identified the beginnings of a cat takeover: a parasite that moves from cats to other mammals which makes mice and humans move through the world a bit more slowly, and with a little less caution. (They say nearly all of France is infected and almost certainly most poets, who were the first modernists to keep cats as pets.)
[Clockwise from top left: Cat face lapel pin from datter; Gold vermeil square earrings from iamdesigns; Mexican cat foot stool from mascarajones; Mixed yarn pom poms from iammie; Crop circle hand woven tapestry from Nattylittlemaker; Vintage wood foot stool from estatehound; 1800s fluted metal box from aquamarinedream.]
But the research is still out as to whether cat parasites are to blame for other aberrant behavior: the private sappiness of the usually hardhearted; the proclivity to sing invented doo-wop songs about kittens; or the curiosity to see if cats are indeed more dapper in bow ties. Maybe this is the parasite’s fault too: I really really love watching you eat, cat.
[Clockwise from top left: 1970s novelty speech bubble sweater from striekmatch; Cat Ice Cream Necklace by AnomalyJewelry; “Lucifurr” tee from burgerandfriends; Squinting kitten tee from LePireShirtDuMonde; Vintage Charles Jourdan architectural heels from livingdollsboudoir; Happy neon story tote bag from LAUK; Ultra striped leggings from Blim.]
Damn you, parasite, for forcing upon me the great burden of having to lie at an angle to accommodate the warm furry lump at the foot of the bed, purring like a drum roll. Give me back my freedom from the one who listens as he sleeps, for the distinct shuffle of your footsteps, finally coming home.
[Clockwise from top left: 1950s sunset color study dress from AnatomyVintage; Black cat block-printed dress from leahgoren; Custom cat ornament from oneeyeddog; Cat paw necklace from cheybeth; Shino tea cup from elenarenker; Vintage cat tapestry coin purse from SkinandWood.]
With my cat around, I’m never the only one who wants to take a nap. And late at night when I’m still awake searching for another thought, the heaviness doesn’t lift, but it does feel shared, like a mutual solitude. Here’s to being a cat lady, parasites or not, like Edward Gorey or Patricia Highsmith. Cats are for people who want to be alone with company.
Su Wu of I'm Revolting continues to compile a list of the things, places and misinterpreted philosophies that somehow manage to coalesce into a well-lived life. These narrative-driven collections will find you stealing out of your alternate personas' closets.