For sale is a 3 page pdf pattern with 7 pictures and instructions for both of the squids written out in plain English (no abbreviations), which will be available for direct download from Etsy.
Using cotton worsted weight yarn and a G hook, and employing only a double loop start (I point you to a great online tutorial) and basic stitches like single crochet, increase, decrease, slip, and chain, this is the easiest pattern available at the Wunderkammer right now. If you are comfortable with crochet, you should be able to make one of these guys in one or two hours. This would also be a great project to learn to crochet with!
As always, I'll be available over email to answer any and all questions you have about the pattern.