Why not try:
"Hey baby, wanna come upstairs and check out my event horizon"*
What could go wrong...
Please note that for health and safety reasons, your black hole will be dispatched in a special box.
The container is designed to protect both you and any unsuspecting postal workers who may come in contact with this astronomical anomaly during transportation. Shipping is relatively hazardless given the black hole's small size (1 inch in diameter), but please do not place your black hole near any significant mass.
Each black hole is formed from hypo-allergenic polyfil and soft man made yarn, within a pet and smoke-free environment.
Surface cleaning only (whilst wearing the correct protective equipment) is recommended to keep it in tip top condition.
This is a collectible piece and has not been tested by an authorized company to certify child safety. Please use your personal judgment when purchasing for anyone under the age of 12. Please do not allow small children to approach its event horizon unsupervised.
As gravitational collapse may occur spontaneously, your black hole may differ slightly from that shown in the listing photos - but it will be just as lovely!
If you fancy knitting your own, check out the pattern listing at:
* This fabulous chat up line has been blatantly stolen from