Etsy Shop for spamberly

The Dude Abides cross stitch

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 14:54:21 -0500

$28.00
That rug really tied the room together.

Hand cross stitched in dark brown, light brown and blue thread on oatmeal canvas. Encased in a crazy cool brushed silver frame. Measures 4" x 4".

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

mature-loaf cross stitch

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 18:11:25 -0500

$38.00
please pardon my filthy filthy mouth-hole.

hand cross stitched in hot hot hot pink and brown thread on pink canvas. framed up in a simple white frame.

measures 7.25" x 5.25

people won't bug you so much if you put this on your desk at work.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

molar cross stitch

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:46:23 -0500

$24.00
molars don't get enough credit. they do most of your chewing for you. they masticate in a most divine way.

celebrate your molars.

hand cross stitched in black thread on white canvas. framed up in an ornate silvery gold frame measuring 4" x 3.5"

hang on your wall or prop up on your desk. or give it to your dentist.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

Rudolph Is Gay

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:46:01 -0500

$22.00
oh, rudolph...when are people gonna stop picking on you?
not anytime soon, probably.

hand cross-stitched in tan, brown, red and black thread on white canvas in a 3.5" circular gold frame.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

ant cross stitch

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:45:34 -0500

$35.00
ants are opportunists. i understand that way of life.

i'll still squash them if they enter my kitchen though.

hand cross stitched in black thread on oatmeal canvas. framed up in a gold frame with black speckles.

prop this one on any flat surface.

measures 5.75" square.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

snaily cross stitch

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 20:45:24 -0500

$25.00
oh please don't poor beer on me, mister and missus homeowner. i am not a slug. okay, i'm kind of like a slug. but i have this pretty shell of a house. look. see how pret...tt..yyy... it ....issssss...ohgodbeer. die.

hand cross stitched in rust, mustard, forest green, and blue on oatmeal canvas. framed up in a shiny brown oval number measuring 5" x 4".

hangs on the wall only. cannot stand up on its own.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

the dude abides DIY cross stitch kit

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:38:25 -0500

$12.00
been thinking about trying your hand at cross stitch?

don't wanna start with some giant project that you'll feel guilty about never finishing?

start small!

if you're a big lebowski fan, this kit is right up your alley (sorry, it was such an easy joke).

kit includes:
needle
canvas (fabric)
floss (thread)
color pattern (charted design)
basic instructions one-sheet
alt_cross_stitch zipper pouch

killer handmade alt_cross_stitch zipper pouch is perfect for carrying around your current needlecraft projects. it measures approx 10" x 6" and is made of sturdy black fabric.

frame not included.

already completed "the dude abides" stitcheries are available with silver frame http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=19896612
or gold frame
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=25830607

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

antlers cross stitch

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:38:16 -0500

$35.00
there's something very calming about a set of antlers. whether on a living creature, or fashioned into some kind of art piece after their host goes to the pastures in the sky.

hand cross stitches in black thread on hunter green canvas. framed up in a sleek black number measuring approx 6.5" x 4.5"

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

pigs taste good magnet

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:38:05 -0500

$20.00
pigs were put on this great earth so we could cut them up and fry them in a pan.

it's called bacon, people.

and if you don't like it, well, then we have to have a serious talk about where this is going.

us.

you and me.

can you tolerate my bacon-lifestyle?

but more importantly, could i ever really take you seriously knowing that you don't eat the very thing i was put on this earth to do?

hand cross stitched in pink, brown, green, and black on oatmeal canvas.

plexiglass enclosure measures 3" x 3" - strong magnet on the back.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

home crap home magnet

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:37:53 -0500

$22.00
crappy homes rock my world. you make it the best you possibly can, and it still falls into the crap category.

hand cross stitched in green, pink, blue, yellow and tan on pink canvas.

black frame. measures roughly 5" x 4"

strong magnet on the back.

show your crappy home some love.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

gulls cross stitch

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:37:41 -0500

$48.00
gulls are all over my neighborhood. there's a mutual respect thing going on between us. but they won't stop pooping on our public benches. and it's gross.

so please stop, mr. & mrs. seagull.

stop.

hand stitched in mauve thread on pink canvas. framed up in a slick black frame measuring 7.5" x 5.5"

hangs on the wall or sits upright.

© 2009 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

go green cross stitch magnet

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 06:39:42 -0400

$20.00
if you're gonna go green, go all the way with it.

hand stitched in greens on oatmeal canvas. measures 3.5" x 3.5" - strong magnet in back.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

I heart Ninjas

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 06:39:42 -0400

$24.00
It's understood that ninjas are not to be messed with. You wouldn't wanna pull the ole whoopie cushion joke on a ninja. Hell, I'd even advise against giving a ninja the finger in traffic, even if the ninja was clearly in the wrong.

Hand cross stitched in black thread on yellow canvas. Framed up in a white 4" x 4.5" frilly frame.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

Lamewad cross stitch in frame

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 06:39:42 -0400

$15.00
Lamewad is one of my favorite words. I utter it under my breath sometimes 12 times a day.

Measures 2.5" x 3.5"

Hand cross stitched hot pink and lavendar on pink canvas. Encased in a cute little black glittery frame.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

boombox cross stitch

Fri, 18 Sep 2009 18:52:21 -0400

$85.00
i know you like to do the safety dance. don't be coy. it's okay. you're among friends here.

hand stitched in black thread on fiddler's blue canvas. framed up in a shiny bright blue frame. measures 7.5" x 5.5".

hangs on your wall or sits up straight on your desk.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

mad ish is gettin on ma nurves cross stitch

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 19:07:54 -0400

$38.00
inspired by
www.flickr.com/photos/spamberly/2316676708/

hand cross stitched in black and white thread on red canvas. framed up in a slick black frame measuring 6.5" x 4.5"

© 2009 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

led zeppelin cross stitch

Sat, 12 Sep 2009 08:48:34 -0400

$65.00
led zeppelin's "that's the way" lyric immortalized forever with the magic of cross stitch.

hand stitched in pinks, white, yellow, blue and green on burgundy canvas. framed up in a slick white frame. measures 8"x6".

hangs on your wall or props up on your desk.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

Fierce magnet

Mon, 07 Sep 2009 14:36:58 -0400

$20.00
He is FIERCE, with his hot pants and his sweatband!

hand cross stitched in dark blue, medium blue, light blue, and light purple on black canvas. Encased in a sturdy plexiglass enclosure. Strong magnet in the back. Measures 3.5" x 3.5".

Perfect for any fierce man's fridge...or lady's.

© 2008 - All text and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

breasts cross stitch

Sat, 05 Sep 2009 16:17:03 -0400

$85.00
ahhh, the perfect breast. no bigger than a handful, perky, just the right nipple, just the right bounce.

a girl can dream.
a boy can cream.

hand cross stitched in various grays on white canvas encased in a white wood frame measuring 4" x 6".

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

neo maxi zoom dweebie cross stitch

Sat, 29 Aug 2009 19:24:08 -0400

$22.00
remember when Andrew Clark (aka Emilio) got high, then did a full on gymnastics routine in the library? yeah, that rocked.

ahhhh, 1985, i miss you sometimes.

Hand cross stitched message from the 80's in blue, green, nacy, and purplek thread on blue fiddlers canvas.

Framed up in a dhiny gold frame. Measures 4" x 3.5"

Get your leg warmers on.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

make toast not war magnet

Tue, 25 Aug 2009 06:46:34 -0400

$20.00
war is just ridiculous. i hope there's never a war on toast. if there is, you can bet money i'll be fighting for toast in every possible way.

hand cross stitched in brown, tan and yellow on oatmeal canvas. encased in a plexiglass enclosure with a strong magnet in the back.

measures 3.5" x 3.5"

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

Sexy Bitch Magnet

Sun, 16 Aug 2009 20:39:05 -0400

$20.00
Who's a sexy bitch? You are!

Cute 3.5" x 3.5" heavy duty magnet.

Hand cross stitched in pink, white, and magenta on pink canvas. Lovely little hearts floating about.

Encased in heavy plexiglass.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

what would buck rogers do magnet

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 09:47:19 -0400

$20.00
ahhh, to be accidentally frozen solid only to save the world after you thaw. i can relate to this.

hand cross stitched in yellow and white thread on black canvas. encased in a sturdy 3.5" x 3.5" plexiglass enclosure. strong magnet in back.

twiki would be envious.

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.

labor of love

Sun, 02 Aug 2009 08:48:32 -0400

$320.00
Hand cross stitched in various shadowy grays on white canvas.

Encased in a black frame measuring 5.5" x 7.5". Pane of glass is in the frame so this girl doesn't get anything else on her face.

This lady is loving every minute of it.

Enjoy!

© 2008 - All text, designs and images are copyright of alt_cross_stitch and are not to be used without prior consent.