You could say that I grew up in a bubble. When you’re born and raised on an island (and this island happens to be Cuba), you have a completely different vision of the world than most people. When I was growing up, I thought that this island was the center of everything. If someone had told me that Cuba was the 8th continent, I would have believed it.

I must preface this story with the fact that I am not an expert on Cuban themes. I haven’t done any studies on the political system of the island or anything like that. However, I can talk about Cuba from my own personal experience, the same way you can talk about the country where you were born.

Have you ever had the experience of revisiting a place with fond childhood memories, only to find it much smaller than you previously imagined? That happened to me when I went back to Cuba after a seven year absence. In December of 2006, I traveled to my hometown of Holguin, Cuba with my children to introduce them to their many relatives. It took me a while to see Cuba for what it really is.

My Cuban childhood was hard. Coming from a very poor family with all kinds of problems, I immersed myself in a creative world, and I think it saved my life.

I strongly believe that anything creative has a curative quality. When I started the local art school at the age of twelve, I thought that I had arrived in paradise. I loved every day as an art student. We didn’t have many resources (I had a ceramic class where for years I never got to fire a single piece), but sometimes you learn more by not having anything. We had to force ourselves to be more creative to make up for the lack of materials.

What we did have in great amounts was a sense of humor that kept us motivated and connected to each other. I don’t remember a single day in art school when I didn’t laugh. Laughter has always been the greatest tool for Cuban people: when you get used to laughing (especially at yourself), you stop being afraid of the dark side of life.

I did the first part of my art studies in Holguin, a province on the east side of the island. When I was fifteen I decided to separate from my mom and four siblings to move to a the province of Camaguey with my boyfriend. Now, you might be thinking: you were ready to be independent at fifteen? Si, I was. I just knew that in order to develop my own world I had to go away from the environment I was in. My mom wasn’t surprised since she did the same thing when she was my age. She just said, “I trust you. If that’s what you think that you should do, go ahead. I support you 100%.”

It’s natural for people for those raised in poor countries to grow up more quickly: you have to think quickly in order to survive. When you are constantly going through extreme situations, you are obligated to develop faster. By the time I was fifteen I already felt like an adult. I was a pretty responsible girl and I graduated from the art school in Camaguey as planned. By the time I was nineteen I was already teaching art, and I really enjoyed having my own students to inspire, the same way I found inspiration in the world around us. However, my ultimate dream was to move to Havana, and although I didn’t get into art school there, I did eventually relocate. It’s a place I truly love, even today.

I left the island for the first time when I was 23. I went to Italy (Genova) for my first solo show out of Cuba. The show was organized by a group of Italian artists who I met in Havana. This trip was a turning point in my life. It was my first time on an airplane, my first time in an airport with luxurious restrooms, my first time seeing snow and my first time seeing so many people together that weren’t Cubans. I had no idea how to dress for the winter since it’s always summer in Cuba. I took with me this leather coat that my neighbor sold to me for twenty five dollars– a fortune to me! It was like five sizes too big for me, plus it was a men’s coat. When I arrived in the airport in Milan my friends didn’t recognize me. They thought that it was a joke!

My time in Italy started changing my ideas about the world. When I went back to the island I saw everything differently. I saw all the limitations that people were used to, like the lack of internet access and all the headaches and bureaucracy involved in travel.

In the meantime, I continued to travel and show my work. However, it wasn’t until I met my husband and I moved to the U.S. that I truly developed a deeper understanding of my home country. I had to learn that I wasn’t simply defined as a Cuban, or just an artist, but also as another person on this planet, part of a larger community of people. I learned to have my own ideas, how to disagree and how to do what I thought was right without having to ask for permission. I had children, and I kept developing my career as an artist. In April of 2007 I even opened my own little store on Etsy! If someone had told me that I was going to do this ten years before I would have laughed at the very idea.

As I write this, I think about how much I have learned in the last seven years. I love my country and I am still very connected to it through my friends and relatives. However, the more I understand the world, the more I think that Cuba has the potential to have a real connection with it.

Many other artists on the island feel the same way. When Cuba become a point of interest for the art world in Europe in the 1990’s, America and Asia, many Cuban artists had the possibility to travel and develop their artistic careers, and they came back with a different understanding of the world and a desire to plant the seeds of change.

Ultimately, Cuban people are not naïve. They want changes, but they don’t want changes imposed upon them. They don’t want the island to suffer the same chaos that the other post-communist countries in Europe had to go through. Cuban people are very well-educated, patient and analytical, and I am sure that this will help the future of the island. One day soon Castro will die and this will mark a new chapter in Cuba’s history. Cuba is already changing and I serve as a prime example. I don’t live in Cuba anymore, but this island will always be part of who I am.

Elsa Mora
Los Angeles, CA 2007

Notes on photos:
#1 “Etsy representative in open dialogue with Castro about future of the island.”
#2: "Doctor and nurse from Etsy take a close look at Cuba’s heart."
Both photos were taken using #1 a little bunny that I purchased on Etsy from detailsstore and #2 two amigurumis that I also purchased on Etsy from raewadolly. The miniature Castro doll is from my own collection, I got it in Madrid many years ago.