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Always Wear A Rubber - Camera Lens Bracelet

Always Wear A Rubber - Camera Lens Bracelet

Description

Once you purchase this bad boy, you can always assure your mom with confidence that yes, in fact, you DO always wear a rubber. After all, she never specified if she was asking about condoms, now did she? *wink, wink*

But contraception aside, there is no doubt in my mind that by wearing this bracelet people will want to sleep with you. I mean, hey, if I saw you wearing this bracelet, I would totally want to sleep with you, and my standards are pretty high. So that should be some consolation.

If it's not, then take comfort in the knowledge that somewhere out there someone is sleeping with somebody, and if it's not you they're sleeping with, then it's just not your turn yet. You'll get some. I promise.

And when you wake up in a pool of half-liquified grape Jell-O with a maraschino cherry in your wallet, your underwear drying on the balcony, and a headache the size of Bavaria, you can send me a thank you note and a Starbucks Gift Card.

[Yes. I'm weird. I know. This is why I don't do drugs. Read on.]

Always Wear A Rubber knows what it means to say I Love You.
It knows the importance of the big things in life.
It knows how you feel when the bacon gets cooked for too long and just turns to powdery crust.
It wants the same things you want.
It needs the same things you need.

So give it some love. Show it a good time out on the town. Let it drink just one more shot of tequila. Let it stalk your ex on Facebook and make menacing phone calls.

It just wants to live.
Is that so much to ask?

Always Wear A Rubber comes with green and white numbering from 5 feet to 20 meters (and even to infinity, if that's how you roll). If you stare at the rubber rectangles for too long you may go cross-eyed, but you may also notice the little "SIGMA" lettering that blends in so well. The satin-finished edges won't scrape your arm the way you like it, but the cuff will hug your wrist like your favorite niece hugs your leg.

So give it a chance. Let it change your life. You'll like it.

Oh, and always wear a rubber.

Approximate measurements: 2-3/4" L x 2-1/8" H x 1-3/4" W with an interior circumference of 7-3/4" and a 1-3/8" wrist opening. This would fit an average to larger man's wrist.

Added on Nov 09, 2009