This thread has been closed and archived.
This discussion is public.
I do almost all of the cleaning by myself and my husband likes to bitch that I do it "Half assed". I'm livid! I'm the only one that does anything around here, including changing dirty diapers all damn day and he has the balls to say that to me?! I told him if he wants it his way then maybe HE should do it! Or maybe he should rinse his goddamn dishes before shoving them into the sink!
Posted at 12:28 pm Jan 11, 2011 EST
He works part time only. For a while he was unemployed and still did nothing to help and bitched. Maybe for a week or two when he got arrested he did the house work and cared for the kids because I was so depressed I couldn't get out of bed. But since then he does the minimal.
If I tried sitting down and talking to him he has this whole thing of blaming me. I tell him something that bothers me and he says "But you...." sentences. If I had soemwhere to go I'd probably leave because I am really sick of this behavior and the shitty life he's given us by being a total dumbass and getting arrested. He lost his job as a result of that! It's been almost a year and I still haven't really forgiven him.
That makes a difference. It's definitely "You don't like the way I do it, do it yourself." If he wants to complain about that you can rebut with "who would do these things for you if I wasn't here? Maybe you need to think about that."
And if you're that close to the end of your rope, getting out sooner rather than later is probably a good move.
Posted at 12:51 pm Jan 11, 2011 EST
He didn't used to be like this. He used to help and was a nice guy. But then he started smoking pot and got arrested twice. First time he lied and said the pot was leftover from before he married me and he must have forgot it was there. Second time he finally admitted it because I was suspicious and he was in jail an entire weekend.
The main reason I haven't left is because I don't want to start over again. I was in two relationships before my husband and each guy was way worse than he is. They were abusive and one of them ran off with everything I owned. My mom said I can come home but she wants me to take a bus home. Which means I have to leave my entire life behind AGAIN and take two kids on the bus with me(which I refuse to do, I am never traveling with my kids again). But then there is my daughter. She's a big daddy's girl and she'd probably be heart broken and hate me forever if I left.
Posted at 1:17 pm Jan 11, 2011 EST
Your daughter sounds young enough that she doesn't realize what kind of person he is. Believe me, once she gets old enough she will start putting the pieces together and have an epiphany, and it'll suck. It might hurt now, but it will be best for her in the long run if he refuses to get treatment or work on his issues.
Posted at 1:35 pm Jan 11, 2011 EST
I asked him to consider drug counseling and marriage counseling. He's avoided it ever since I mentioned it.
My daughter is 3. She loves her father so much that she doesn't like me much. Everytime she comes home from school if he's not the one to pick her up she'll scowl at me and have a tantrum.
Posted at 1:42 pm Jan 11, 2011 EST