smarmyclothes
Kalamazoo, Michigan ·
smarmyclothes
handmade clothing for your inner geek and circus freakKalamazoo, Michigan 2626 Sales On Etsy since 2008
Announcement
Every piece in my shop is handmade by me!
CURRENT TURN AROUND TIMES: (Clothing: 3-4 weeks) (Accessories: 3-5 days)
smarm·y (smär'mē)
adj., -i·er, -i·est.
1. unpleasantly and excessively suave or ingratiating in manner or speech. 2. hypocritically, complacently, or effusively earnest; unctuous. 3. of low or sleazy taste 4. handmade dresses, tops, and skirts with bright colors, mutilated t-shirts, polka dots and stripes.
-Lex
http://www.smarmyclothes.com
http://www.whatthecraft.com
Announcement
Every piece in my shop is handmade by me!
CURRENT TURN AROUND TIMES: (Clothing: 3-4 weeks) (Accessories: 3-5 days)
smarm·y (smär'mē)
adj., -i·er, -i·est.
1. unpleasantly and excessively suave or ingratiating in manner or speech. 2. hypocritically, complacently, or effusively earnest; unctuous. 3. of low or sleazy taste 4. handmade dresses, tops, and skirts with bright colors, mutilated t-shirts, polka dots and stripes.
-Lex
http://www.smarmyclothes.com
http://www.whatthecraft.com
Reviews
Jack on Apr 7, 2018
I have been in awe of this dress for a while, and finally put enough money aside to get a version of it that a dear person of mine would enjoy. They were ecstatic to put it on as soon as I gave it to them, and I underestimated how small they were, and the dress was slightly roomy in the bodice area, but they loved it even more because of that. The material is stretchy and thick, and reminds me of a thin neoprene fabric. They said it felt very nice on their skin, like a light safety blanket almost. Though one needs to be sure to wear shorts underneath if they don't want anyone looking at their undergarments. Realized too late when we were dancing that the skirt really takes air during a spin, but man it is beautiful to see. I forgot to get a picture of it in spin-action, but it looks awesome. Very happy with the purchase.
About
Rad clothing for dudettes who want to stand out in a crowd. Embrace your inner circus freak.
SmarmyClothes is a one woman circus act featuring a kaleidoscope of colors, patterns, and subcultures. Every item is designed and made by me.
I'm pretty much self-taught - by training I'm a nurse. I learned to sew in a middle school "Life Skills" class and from my mom. After learning the basic skills of sewing, it was pretty much just lots of practice from there.
I've been selling my stuff since 2003, and SmarmyClothes.com was established in January of 2005. SmarmyClothes was pretty much a hobby until I finished my bachelor's degree (for Nursing) in December of 2005, when I decided that doing fashion design full time sounded like a grand idea.
I work pretty much 7 days a week and my jerk of a boss (hey wait, that's me!) doesn't give me dick for benefits, but I still wouldn't trade my job as a starving artist for anything. I get to stay up late, sleep in, and work in my PJs.
If you're not sick of me already, you can check out my blog: http://whatthecraft.com
I'm probably posting about food as we speak.
I also sing and play bass in a punk rock band - The Extreme Unicorns.
Thanks to all of you that buy my clothes. If you didn't support SmarmyClothes, I know exactly where I'd be... (two words: stool sample). You guys rock!
Shop members
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Lex
Owner, Maker, Designer
Howdy, I'm Lex! When I'm not eating lots of food or making a mess, I juggle the designing, pattern making, sewing, photographing, web design, and everything else in between here at SmarmyClothes.
Shop policies
Accepted payment methods
- Accepts Etsy Gift Cards and Etsy Credits
Returns and exchanges
- Custom or personalized orders
- Perishable products (like food or flowers)
- Digital downloads
- Intimate items (for health/hygiene reasons)
I have the utmost confidence that you will be 100% satisfied with your item.
If you have a problem with your item or think I've made a mistake, please email me with your concerns within 7 days of receiving your order.
If you choose one of the STANDARD listed sizes for my clothing, you may return it for store credit, provided you contact me within 7 days and the item is returned unworn, unwashed, and undamaged. (The same goes for accessories and items from the "one of a kind" section of my shop.)
If you opt to customize an order in any way- be it custom sizing, alternate fabric, etc. I am not able to accept returns, though I may be able to do alterations for an additional fee. Please contact me within 7 days of receiving your order to discuss such an alteration.
Rush fees are non-refundable.
If you need to cancel an order, please do so in a timely manner. If materials have already been purchased for your order, your refund will be minus the cost of supplies.
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SEWING PATTERNS: Due to the nature of downloadable patterns and templates, all sales are final. Patterns may not be refunded or exchanged.
Please please PLEASE make sure to save a copy of your patterns and templates to an external hard drive or cloud drive. You could even just email the pattern to yourself as an attachment. That way, in the event of a computer virus, crash, etc, you will always have a safe copy of your patterns.
In the event that you lose the pattern and do not have a back-up, please contact me, and I should be able to send you a new copy. I will do this once- and only once. So let me reiterate the importance of backing up your pattern files!
Payment
I am happy to accept payments in installments, just contact me!
If you'd like to pay by mail, please contact me before purchase to make arrangements.
Shipping
CURRENT TURN AROUND TIMES:
-Clothing: 3-4 weeks
-Accessories: 1 week
-One of a kind: 1-4 days
Most sewing patterns are available for immediate download after purchase- you should receive an email from Etsy notifying you that your files is available for download.
Sewing patterns that are not listed as instant download will be emailed to your Paypal address 12-48 hours after payment is received.
IF YOU ARE IN THE US: Most items are automatically shipped Priority (2-3 days), but I am more than happy to ship First Class, just contact me before paying.
IF YOU ARE OUTSIDE OF THE US: Items are shipped via First Class International by default. FCI generally takes 1-2 weeks, but sometimes takes much longer. Please contact me for Priority Shipping information if you need your order by a certain date.
If you would like to purchase insurance for your order, please let me know before you pay!
INTERNATIONAL INSURANCE IS AVAILABLE!
Additional policies and FAQs
I use a lot of specialty fabrics and delicate trims (not to mention the hook and eyes and things that will snag), and they really needed to be treated gently. Even the "gentle" cycle on the machine is not recommended.
If you insist of machine washing (at your own risk!), I recommend putting the item inside a sweater bag or pillowcase first.
I can not stress enough how important it is to measure either yourself or a clothing item that fits you well before ordering.
For more information on how to measure yourself, please see: http://smarmyclothes.com/sizing/