UnfortunateFace

Austin, Texas · 1279 Sales

UnfortunateFace

Austin, Texas 1279 Sales On Etsy since 2013

5 out of 5 stars
(184)
Sean Daigle

Contact shop owner

Sean Daigle

Reviews

Average item review
5 out of 5 stars
(184)
katpollendine

katpollendine on Feb 6, 2017

5 out of 5 stars

Received this today - just emailed yesterday saying it hadn't arrived to hopefully you see this today! International postage, etc. Wasn't sure how to send a second message. Item arrived as described, thanks v much.

Ryan Brown

Ryan Brown on Jan 3, 2017

5 out of 5 stars

Item shipped on time and turned out better than I could have thought

View all 184 reviews

Shop policies

Last updated on January 8, 2014
Hi. I sell various things that I have either made myself or stolen from little old ladies whom I have also most likely beaten to death. All proceeds from anything you purchase from me will go towards buying me as many potato sacks full of doorknobs as possible, so that I may more efficiently eradicate the elderly population in a swift and violent manner.

Accepted payment methods

  • Pay with Visa
  • Pay with Master Card
  • Pay with American Express
  • Pay with Discover
  • Pay with PayPal
  • Buy with Apple Pay
  • Pay with Sofort
  • Pay with iDeal
  • Accepts Etsy Gift Cards and Etsy Credits
Payment
FUCK YOU. PAY ME.
Shipping
I only ship to USA. Sorry to all you freedom haters in your trash countries! 'MURICA.
Refunds and Exchanges
Nooooooooooooooooooooooope.
Additional policies and FAQs
FAQ

Q: Can I commission you to make me a painting or drawing?
A: Yes, I will make you anything you want, unless you ask me to make something John Mayer related or something retarded like that, in which case, I will fly to your house, beat you within an inch of your life, and then most likely burn your house down.

Q: Why is your shipping costs so high?
A: First off, its "why ARE your shipping costs so high", you fucking idiot. Secondly, the USPS are a bunch of gangsters and I have no control over their crazy high pricing policies. I try to ship everything as cheap as possible but larger paintings are, you know, LARGE so there isn't really any cheap alternative to shipping them, outside of smashing them to bits with a hammer and cramming the battered pieces into a small box, which is a method I've only used about 14 or 15 times in the past.

Q: Why do you make so many Simpsons paintings? Why don't you do Family Guy paintings?
A: Why don't you kill yourself?

Q: So I recently lost my job and now I'm homeless and constantly hungry and last night some frat boys beat me unconscious with baseball bats and blinded me with battery acid. Should I still buy a painting from you even though I have no home to put it in and furthermore even if I did, I'm blind as shit now so I couldn't even look at it if I wanted to?
A: Yes.