I live to paint. It is my oxygen. My art shop is a love story to my twin sister Jude. We were inseparable. When she died at the age of 58 , I retreated to my room. Drapes closed, I totally isolated myself from family and friends. I was in a dark abyss and could not find my way out.
Like Humpty Dumpty.." All the King's Horses and all the King's Men couldn't put Humpty back again." I screamed out her name in the middle of the night and would wake up with a tear soaked pillow.
Jude came to me in my dreams Four Years Later and screamed, " GET OUT OF BED AND DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIFE! ENOUGH !" She left as fast as she came. (2009)
I emerged from the room as an artist. I was raised in a small school with no art class. I never held a paint brush in my hand before.
I had lived in the dark so long that the bright light blinded me. I saw dark lines around every object. It was like a heavy magic marker was outlining my green couch, my lamps every single object in the rooms.
I attempted to explain it to my husband, but he thought that I finally lost my mind. I was laughing and dancing in my PJs. Vibrant gorgeous colors filled my world. Like a gust of wind that just blew all the pain away.
The weight of the world was off my shoulders. All those years in pain was lifted that night. To celebrate we went away that weekend to a beautiful bed and breakfast.
While driving to our charming village the sky was so blue and I still saw lines outlining every object that I saw. Everything was exaggerated. Like a tree that I had seen thousands of times was now Outlined, vibrant greens in various shades with shadows so vivid within the tree.
As we poked around a charming art gallery I studied a beautiful painting. I put my head on my husband's shoulder and cried softly. I whispered to him, " Bobby I am an artist."
"What?" He had seen all my attempts at drawing over the years on the cards that I gave him. He knew what I could do and what I couldn't do.
I said, " That is why I see lines around everything. That is why I see vibrant colors and shadows.
I didn't say that I wanted to be an artist, or that I would like to paint. I stated that I was an Artist. Period.
I went back to the hotel and drew the same picture as I had studied. He was absolutely shocked.
I could not wait to get home to well, Paint. I had no idea what the tools I needed were called, Pallet Knife for one, but I knew how to use all of them.
I knew techniques that it took Artists Years to Achieve.
At the age of 62 I drew the same stick figures that I did in the 2nd grade and the next day could draw and paint anything. It is truly a miracle.
We moved to a Pine Island, Florida so that I could paint in the serenity that I needed. Away from Stress. Away from the world. Yes, Art is my passion and has now become my heartbeat.
I am exactly where I want to be. Exactly where I am supposed to be. I am at peace.