Never Trust the Living Tee, Gothic Dark Humor Shirt, Gravestone Graphic T-Shirt, Cemetery Goth Apparel, Unisex Dark Tee, Funny Gothic Shirt

🪦 Embrace the macabre with the Never Trust the Living Tee. Featuring a gravestone-inspired graphic and dark humor text, this shirt is a must-have for goths, cemetery wanderers, and anyone who enjoys a touch of the morbid.

This shirt is a 👕 Light Fitted Tee (Bella+Canvas 3001) – Lightweight, soft, and breathable with a slightly tailored fit for a more modern look. Size Chart: https://www.bellacanvas.com/product/3001/Unisex-Jersey-Short-Sleeve-Tee.html

Please reach out if you'd like this design on a different garment or product, such as a different style of shirt, hoodie, tank top, sweatshirt, wall art, blanket, or even a shower curtain. If you can dream it, we'll do our best to make it happen!

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🕷️ Product Information & Sizing
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🎨 What printing method do you use?

We only work with production partners who use Direct-to-Garment (DTG) printing, which produces high-quality, vibrant prints that last. DTG printing allows for detailed designs with a soft feel, unlike vinyl or screen printing.

👕 What are the differences between your t-shirt options?

We offer several high-quality shirt styles, each with unique qualities:

👕 Heavy Classic Tee (Gildan 5000) – Durable, medium-weight cotton with a boxy fit. Great for everyday wear and has that classic, concert merch feel. Size Chart: https://www.gildan.com/us/en/5000-adult-t-shirt-en_us/

👕 Light Fitted Tee (Bella+Canvas 3001) – Lightweight, soft, and breathable with a slightly tailored fit for a more modern look. Size Chart: https://www.bellacanvas.com/product/3001/Unisex-Jersey-Short-Sleeve-Tee.html

👕 Relaxed Soft Tee (Comfort Colors 1717) – A thicker, looser-fitting shirt with a pre-washed vintage feel, perfect for an oversized look. Size Chart: https://www.comfortcolors.com/us/en/1717-heavyweight-adult-tee-en_us/

OUR OTHER GARMENTS INCLUDE:

Ladies Tee (Gildan 5000L) – Semi-fitted and soft, great for a relaxed but feminine look. Size Chart: https://www.gildan.com/us/en/5000l-women-s-t-shirt-en_us/

Long Sleeve Tee (Gildan 2400) – Classic fit, medium-weight fabric, perfect for cooler weather. Runs smaller than usual; consider sizing up. Size Chart: https://www.gildan.com/us/en/2400-adult-long-sleeve-t-shirt-en_us/

Racerback Tank (Next Level 1533) – Lightweight, flowy, and relaxed—runs small, so consider sizing up. Size Chart: https://www.nextlevelapparel.com/products/ideal-racerback-tank-banana-cream

Hoodie (Gildan 18500) – Cozy, classic fit with a cotton-poly blend for warmth. True to size but if you like your hoodies on the baggy side, size up please. Size Chart: https://www.gildan.com/us/en/18500-adult-hooded-sweatshirt-en_us/

Sweatshirt (Gildan 18000) – Classic crewneck with a medium-heavy cotton-poly fabric. True to size but if you like your hoodies on the baggy side, size up please. Size Chart: https://www.gildan.com/us/en/18000-adult-crewneck-sweatshirt-en_us/

Kids Softstyle Tee (Gildan 64000B) – Soft, lightweight, and durable for active little cryptid hunters. These shirts run a tad small so please follow the size chart. Size Chart: https://www.gildan.com/us/en/64000b-youth-t-shirt-en_us/

📏 How do I choose the right size?

Use the size chart provided or choose a link from the ones above to find a chart. To measure:

Width = Armpit to armpit

Chest = Width x2

If you’d like a specific style not listed, let us know!

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🎨 About our design process
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Our designs are created through a blend of methods, including curated public domain imagery, original hand-drawn artwork, graphic designs using Procreate, Photoshop (or Photoshop-like software), , and pieces refined with AI-assisted tools such as filtering or vectorization. We also create composites that integrate AI technology with traditional graphic design techniques. We don't discriminate against any tools used in the creative process. These tools have become industry standard, and in fact, it’s likely AI played a role in the very search results that led you to our Etsy shop.

Regardless of the tools used, every design is fueled by an artist pounding copious amounts of caffeine, blasting heavy metal, and watching vintage horror movies on mute for inspiration.

Our designs are popular and often imitated elsewhere. We view imitation as a form of flattery—and instead of chasing copycats, we rise above the competition with a continuous stream of new work, high-quality printing, and superior customer service.

And just for the record—just as we don’t discriminate against the Bigfoot or Mothmen we proudly “employ,” we also keep an open mind about all forms of intelligence. Research even suggests that the Greys may be a kind of biological AI created by an extraterrestrial, ultraterrestrial, or perhaps even a future human race. We don’t discriminate against them either.

At The Crypto Zoo, all intelligences are welcome—whether human, cryptid, or AI—to enhance your badass clothing that matches your badass lifestyle. Every purchase supports a family-run business of artists and imagineers who live to create the strange, the bold, and the unforgettable.

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🚀 Shipping & Delivery
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📦 How long does it take to receive my order?

Apparel: Our items are made to order and typically ship within 2-4 business days

Home Decor: Ships within 1-5 business days

You’ll receive a tracking number once your order ships.

📦 I only received one of my items. Where is the other?

To ensure faster delivery, some items may ship separately. If you receive part of your order first, the rest should be on its way soon! Etsy only allows the first tracking number to be sent through their system. Please reach out if you would like to check on the order or request another tracking number!

📬 My order hasn’t arrived yet—what should I do?

Check your tracking number for updates.

If the tracking shows "Delivered" but you haven’t received it:

Verify the shipping address you gave was correct.

Check with neighbors or building management.

Contact the shipping carrier for more details.

If your order is lost in transit or cannot be found, reach out to us for further assistance. We will do our best to ensure you get your item!

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🔄 Returns & Policies
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❌ Cancellations

There is a 24-hour window to cancel an order after you place it. Please contact us ASAP if you need to cancel. Once the shirt goes into production, we cannot cancel the item as our items are made-to-order and we do not carry inventory.

⮑ Returns & Exchanges

I accept returns within 14 days of delivery, provided the item is unworn, unwashed, in its original condition, and free of damage, lint, hair, or odors. If you wouldn't want to receive it from my shop, I don't want it back.

💵 Who pays for return shipping?

If the item arrived with a printing defect or damage, there is no need to return it. Just send me photos of the issue so I can issue a refund or replacement.

If you were send an incorrect item and it was our error (we are only human - well, except for the bigfoots that work for us) → We cover the return label (or replacement) → Please let me know and send photos and I will send a shipping label in a PDF/PNG file for you to print and affix to the package.

If the return is due to fit, style preference, or buyer’s change of mind, → customer pays return shipping

⮑ Refunds & Replacements

Refunds or replacements are issued after the returned item is received and inspected.
If the item is returned in new condition, it will be restocked and processed normally.

If the item shows signs of wear, washing, deodorant stains, pet hair, smoke odor, etc., the return will be denied, and the item can be shipped back to you at your cost.

⮑ How to start a return
Please contact me within 14 days of delivery with:

Your order number

The reason for the return

I’ll reply with simple next steps based on the situation.

❌ Non-returnable items
Because all products are made to order, I cannot accept returns for:

Used or worn apparel

Custom or personalized items (unless defective)

⮑ Late / lost deliveries
If shipping delays are caused by the carrier, let me know, and we will handle it on a situational basis.

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💀 Other Questions & Contact Info
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👽 What is Crypto Zoo Tees all about?

We create cryptid, horror, and punk-inspired designs for those who love all things weird and wonderful. Whether you're a Bigfoot believer, UFO enthusiast, or horror movie fanatic, we have a shirt for you!

❓ Still have questions?

🕸️ Contact us any time or visit our store: http://www.cryptozootees.com/

👻 Follow us on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/cryptozoostore

💀 Join the spooky fun on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/cryptozooclothing