Are you actually an orphan?

Yep. Full-fledged, card-carrying adult orphan. This brand is powered by grief, gallows humor, and caffeine.

Isn’t this… a little dark?

So was the funeral. We’re just making the best of it.

Is it okay to laugh at this?

We checked. The United Nations says it’s fine. Probably.

Do your shirts come with trauma support?

No, but they do come with premium cotton and a vague sense of unresolved grief.

Will wearing this shirt make people uncomfortable?

God, we hope so. If not, try pairing it with a thousand-yard stare and a hollow laugh.

Will wearing this shirt make people uncomfortable?

God, we hope so. If not, try pairing it with a thousand-yard stare and a hollow laugh.

Is this brand trauma-informed?

Yes, and trauma-formed. And trauma-funded. We’re really leaning in.

What if my parents are still alive? Can I still wear this?

Sure, but be prepared for them to ask some very awkward questions.

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Price:$28.00+

To Boldly Go… | Star Trek Parody Shirt | Sarcastic Sci-Fi Humor Tee

Name: To Boldly Go… | Star Trek Parody Shirt | Sarcastic Sci-Fi Humor Tee
Brand: R2Threads
SKU: 4360078239
Availability: InStock
Rating: 5.0 (8 reviews)

R2Threads

Arrives soon! Get it by Jun 12-20 if you order today

Returns & exchanges accepted

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Star Seller. This seller consistently earned 5-star reviews, shipped on time, and replied quickly to any messages they received.

For every explorer who realized space (or social events) wasn’t worth the trip. This parody shirt takes the most famous Trek line and gives it the dark, sarcastic twist it always needed. Featuring a bold Star Trek–inspired font and a glitching starship silhouette, this tee is perfect for fans who would rather beam back to bed than boldly go anywhere.

• Unisex fit — designed for captains, redshirts, and everyone in between
• Soft cotton blend — comfier than Starfleet-issue uniforms
• Bold screenprint design — high-contrast, snark intact
• Great gift for Trekkies, nerds, or anyone who hates leaving the house

Live long, laugh darkly, and stay home.

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), R2 and R2 ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at Rudisel1981 [!at] gmail.com. You can also write to us at po box 25 tillamook oregon 97141 or po box 25 tillamook oregon 97141.

Order today to get by Jun 12-20
Returns & exchanges accepted within 30 days
Free shipping
Ships from: Charlotte, NC

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R2Threads ·

Tillamook, Oregon

5.0

48 sales

10 months on Etsy

2 shop members

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Rave reviews Average review rating is 4.8 or higher.

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Reviews for this item

Buyer highlights, summarized by AI: Fast shipping · Happy with purchase

5.0

(3 reviews)

5.0 Item quality

5.0 Shipping

5.0 Customer service

100% Buyers recommend

5 This item

Mary Mar 31, 2026

Very happy with it, got here quick. Thanks

Mary Mar 31, 2026

5 This item

Michelle Mar 8, 2026

While this tee wound up costing a lot more than I intended on spending, my husband loves it, and he’s looking forward to wearing it. I will update the review if for some reason it doesn’t wash well.

Michelle Mar 8, 2026