• May include: A black cross-stitch fabric featuring the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE above a scene of a person, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest. Includes four embroidery floss skeins in brown, pink, blue, and green, and metal scissors.
  • May include: A purple graphic with white text reading Special Offer, Buy 2 patterns - Save 15%, Buy 3 patterns - Save 25%, Automatic discount at checkout Simply add items to your cart - no code required, and ONE SEO, featuring a needle and thread icon.
  • May include: A digital cross stitch pattern information sheet on a dark purple background. The text reads Digital Cross Stitch Pattern, followed by details about PDF downloads, color and black and white charts, DMC thread lists, and compatibility.
  • May include: A purple graphic with white text reading Our Guarantee: 100% Original Design by OneSeo, Clear & Easy-to-Read Symbols, Print-Friendly, Free Page Layout Adjustment, Free Updated File if needed, Friendly Support Anytime, and One Seo.
  • May include: A cross stitch pattern on a grid with black and white symbols on a purple background. The text reads SAMPLE PATTERN, B&W + Symbol pattern, and ONE SEO. The design features geometric shapes and floral motifs within the grid squares.
  • May include: A cross stitch pattern on a grid featuring geometric floral motifs in pink, yellow, and blue. The text reads SAMPLE PATTERN, Colour + Symbol Pattern, and ONE SEO. The design is set against a solid purple background with a needle icon.
  • May include: A deep purple graphic featuring a white line-art needle forming a heart shape at the top and bottom. The text reads: Official OneSeo Design, Original file & full support only available here, and ONE SEO in a dotted font style.
  • May include: A cross-stitch project on cream fabric featuring a girl, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest scene with the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE. Includes three embroidery floss skeins in green and blue, and a pair of metal scissors.
  • May include: A cross stitch pattern on beige fabric featuring a girl, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest with the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE. Includes two green and blue embroidery floss skeins at the top, two blue and tan skeins, and scissors.
  • May include: A cross-stitch pattern on white fabric featuring a girl, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest, with the text "WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE" above. Includes embroidery floss in blue, green, tan, pink, and yellow, and metal scissors.
  • May include: A cross-stitch project on light green fabric featuring a person in a blue dress, a deer, a rabbit, birds, and flowers. The text reads "WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE". Includes six embroidery floss skeins in various colors and metal scissors.
  • May include: A light blue cross stitch fabric featuring the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE above a framed scene of a child, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest. The kit includes embroidery floss in yellow, pink, blue, and green, and metal scissors.
  • May include: A cross-stitch project on light purple fabric featuring a girl, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest scene with the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE. Includes two skeins of embroidery floss and a pair of ornate metal scissors.
  • Dark Humor Cross Stitch Pattern, F*cked Up Time To Be Alive Subversive , Sarcastic Nature Landscape, Woodland Animal Folk, Stitch Chart PDF image 14
  • May include: A cross-stitch pattern on light pink fabric featuring a girl in a blue dress, a deer, a rabbit, birds, and flowers within a rectangular border. The text "WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE" is stitched above. Includes embroidery floss and scissors.
  • May include: A black cross-stitch fabric featuring the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE above a scene of a person, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest. Includes four embroidery floss skeins in brown, pink, blue, and green, and metal scissors.
  • Product video
  • May include: A purple graphic with white text reading Special Offer, Buy 2 patterns - Save 15%, Buy 3 patterns - Save 25%, Automatic discount at checkout Simply add items to your cart - no code required, and ONE SEO, featuring a needle and thread icon.
  • May include: A digital cross stitch pattern information sheet on a dark purple background. The text reads Digital Cross Stitch Pattern, followed by details about PDF downloads, color and black and white charts, DMC thread lists, and compatibility.
  • May include: A purple graphic with white text reading Our Guarantee: 100% Original Design by OneSeo, Clear & Easy-to-Read Symbols, Print-Friendly, Free Page Layout Adjustment, Free Updated File if needed, Friendly Support Anytime, and One Seo.
  • May include: A cross stitch pattern on a grid with black and white symbols on a purple background. The text reads SAMPLE PATTERN, B&W + Symbol pattern, and ONE SEO. The design features geometric shapes and floral motifs within the grid squares.
  • May include: A cross stitch pattern on a grid featuring geometric floral motifs in pink, yellow, and blue. The text reads SAMPLE PATTERN, Colour + Symbol Pattern, and ONE SEO. The design is set against a solid purple background with a needle icon.
  • May include: A deep purple graphic featuring a white line-art needle forming a heart shape at the top and bottom. The text reads: Official OneSeo Design, Original file & full support only available here, and ONE SEO in a dotted font style.
  • May include: A cross-stitch project on cream fabric featuring a girl, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest scene with the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE. Includes three embroidery floss skeins in green and blue, and a pair of metal scissors.
  • May include: A cross stitch pattern on beige fabric featuring a girl, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest with the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE. Includes two green and blue embroidery floss skeins at the top, two blue and tan skeins, and scissors.
  • May include: A cross-stitch pattern on white fabric featuring a girl, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest, with the text "WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE" above. Includes embroidery floss in blue, green, tan, pink, and yellow, and metal scissors.
  • May include: A cross-stitch project on light green fabric featuring a person in a blue dress, a deer, a rabbit, birds, and flowers. The text reads "WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE". Includes six embroidery floss skeins in various colors and metal scissors.
  • May include: A light blue cross stitch fabric featuring the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE above a framed scene of a child, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest. The kit includes embroidery floss in yellow, pink, blue, and green, and metal scissors.
  • May include: A cross-stitch project on light purple fabric featuring a girl, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest scene with the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE. Includes two skeins of embroidery floss and a pair of ornate metal scissors.
  • Dark Humor Cross Stitch Pattern, F*cked Up Time To Be Alive Subversive , Sarcastic Nature Landscape, Woodland Animal Folk, Stitch Chart PDF image 14
  • May include: A cross-stitch pattern on light pink fabric featuring a girl in a blue dress, a deer, a rabbit, birds, and flowers within a rectangular border. The text "WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE" is stitched above. Includes embroidery floss and scissors.
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Dark Humor Cross Stitch Pattern, F*cked Up Time To Be Alive Subversive , Sarcastic Nature Landscape, Woodland Animal Folk, Stitch Chart PDF

ONESEO  
5 out of 5 stars

Item highlights

  • Digital download
  • Digital file type(s): 3 PDF, 2 other files

Seller's description

F*cked Up Time To Be Alive Subversive Cross Stitch Pattern, Dark Humor Sarcastic Nature Landscape Woodland Animal Folk Counted Stitch Chart PDF

Embrace the hilarious reality of modern life with this ultimate subversive cross stitch pattern!

Perfect for lovers of dark humor, snarky art, and anyone who appreciates a brutally honest masterpiece. This captivating design perfectly pairs a highly inappropriate, relatable quote with the most innocent, idyllic vintage nature scene. It is the ultimate sarcastic statement piece and looks absolutely brilliant when stitched using vibrant, solid thread colors.

A Tour of the Ironic Masterpiece (Design Details):
This mesmerizing chart is packed with a hilarious contrast of bold text and sweet, nostalgic elements:

The Brutal Truth: The top of the design features bold, unapologetic typography loudly stating: "WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE".

The Innocent Scene: Directly contrasting the snarky text is a beautifully peaceful, storybook-style setting. At the center stands a sweet, smiling girl with braids, wearing a classic blue dress and white apron.

Woodland Friends: She is blissfully surrounded by the absolute cutest forest animals, including an adorable fawn, a happy little bunny, sweet singing birds, and fluttering butterflies.

Idyllic Nature: The entire scene is perfectly framed by a rustic border of brown trees, blooming colorful flowers, and classic red mushrooms.

With a highly curated, nostalgic palette of 20 DMC colors, this design captures the hilarious clash between a sweet fairy-tale aesthetic and dark modern humor perfectly.

✨ Chart Specifications:

Stitch Count: 162 wide x 172 high

Total Colors: 20 DMC Stranded Cotton (A vibrant, nostalgic palette of earth tones, soft blues, and floral pinks)

Fabric Recommendation: White, oatmeal, or light parchment Aida cloth. (Stitching this design on a natural, rustic-toned fabric will beautifully highlight the vintage folk art aesthetic!)

Stitch Types: Full Cross Stitches only—perfectly beginner-friendly with no fractional stitches.

Finished Size (13 count Aida / 13 Mesh): 12.5 x 13.2 inches (31.7 x 33.6 cm)

Finished Size (14 count Aida): 11.6 x 12.3 inches (29.4 x 31.2 cm)

Finished Size (16 count Aida): 10.1 x 10.8 inches (25.7 x 27.3 cm)

Finished Size (18 count Aida): 9.0 x 9.6 inches (22.9 x 24.3 cm)

🌻 Why You’ll Love This Project:

Hilarious Contrast: The juxtaposition of snarky, subversive text with a sweet woodland scene makes this the ultimate conversation starter.

Chart Friendly: Designed with clean, flat blocks of solid color and absolute high clarity, making it an absolute joy to count and stitch on your favorite Aida fabric.

Relaxing Project: A highly satisfying single-chart project packed with adorable details that will keep you smiling (and laughing) as you stitch.

📂 You Will Receive:
A comprehensive digital kit compatible with printing and digital tracking apps:
✔️ PDF — Color cross stitch chart (Symbols over Color blocks)
✔️ PDF — B&W symbol cross stitch chart (High contrast for easy printing)
✔️ SVG — Large symbols-only layout
✔️ SVG — Color version for customization
✔️ PDF — Pattern Keeper & Markup R-XP compatible files for digital tracking

⚠️ PLEASE NOTE:
DIGITAL PRODUCT: This listing is for digital files only. No physical fabric, thread, or kit will be shipped to you.
INSTANT DOWNLOAD: Your files will be available immediately after purchase via your Etsy account.


Cross Stitch Chart, Subversive Stitch, Dark Humor Pattern, Funny Sarcastic Art, Snarky Cross Stitch, Fucked Up Time, Woodland Animal, Cute Girl Pattern, Vintage Folk Art, Meme Cross Stitch, Counted Stitch Chart, Nature Landscape, Craft PDF

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Only 10 left and in 3 carts

Price:$5.00

Save 15% when you buy 2 items at this shop.

You can only make an offer when buying a single item

Delivery

Instant download

Your files will be available to download once payment is confirmed. Here's how.

Instant download items don't accept returns, exchanges or cancellations. Please contact the seller about any problems with your order.

Reviews for this item

5.0

We calculate this number using a recency-weighted average of all ratings, with a rating's value decreasing by half each year to best reflect the current experience.

(5 reviews)

5.0 Item quality
5.0 Shipping
5.0 Customer service
100% Buyers recommend
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5 out of 5 stars 5 This item

Young Sep 19, 2026

Perfect, thank you!

Young Sep 19, 2026

5 out of 5 stars 5 This item

Lacey Aug 24, 2026

This pattern is hilarious! Been waiting to start this one

Lacey Aug 24, 2026

5 out of 5 stars 5 This item

MP Aug 2, 2026

Great directions and fun pattern!

MP Aug 2, 2026

5 out of 5 stars 5 This item

Sarah Jul 21, 2026

Love this. Easy download. Can't wait to finish this one!

Sarah Jul 21, 2026

Seller's description

Specifications

May include: A black cross-stitch fabric featuring the text WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE above a scene of a person, a deer, and a rabbit in a forest. Includes four embroidery floss skeins in brown, pink, blue, and green, and metal scissors.

F*cked Up Time To Be Alive Subversive Cross Stitch Pattern, Dark Humor Sarcastic Nature Landscape Woodland Animal Folk Counted Stitch Chart PDF

Embrace the hilarious reality of modern life with this ultimate subversive cross stitch pattern!

Perfect for lovers of dark humor, snarky art, and anyone who appreciates a brutally honest masterpiece. This captivating design perfectly pairs a highly inappropriate, relatable quote with the most innocent, idyllic vintage nature scene. It is the ultimate sarcastic statement piece and looks absolutely brilliant when stitched using vibrant, solid thread colors.

A Tour of the Ironic Masterpiece (Design Details):
This mesmerizing chart is packed with a hilarious contrast of bold text and sweet, nostalgic elements:

The Brutal Truth: The top of the design features bold, unapologetic typography loudly stating: "WHAT A FUCKED UP TIME TO BE ALIVE".

The Innocent Scene: Directly contrasting the snarky text is a beautifully peaceful, storybook-style setting. At the center stands a sweet, smiling girl with braids, wearing a classic blue dress and white apron.

Woodland Friends: She is blissfully surrounded by the absolute cutest forest animals, including an adorable fawn, a happy little bunny, sweet singing birds, and fluttering butterflies.

Idyllic Nature: The entire scene is perfectly framed by a rustic border of brown trees, blooming colorful flowers, and classic red mushrooms.

With a highly curated, nostalgic palette of 20 DMC colors, this design captures the hilarious clash between a sweet fairy-tale aesthetic and dark modern humor perfectly.

✨ Chart Specifications:

Stitch Count: 162 wide x 172 high

Total Colors: 20 DMC Stranded Cotton (A vibrant, nostalgic palette of earth tones, soft blues, and floral pinks)

Fabric Recommendation: White, oatmeal, or light parchment Aida cloth. (Stitching this design on a natural, rustic-toned fabric will beautifully highlight the vintage folk art aesthetic!)

Stitch Types: Full Cross Stitches only—perfectly beginner-friendly with no fractional stitches.

Finished Size (13 count Aida / 13 Mesh): 12.5 x 13.2 inches (31.7 x 33.6 cm)

Finished Size (14 count Aida): 11.6 x 12.3 inches (29.4 x 31.2 cm)

Finished Size (16 count Aida): 10.1 x 10.8 inches (25.7 x 27.3 cm)

Finished Size (18 count Aida): 9.0 x 9.6 inches (22.9 x 24.3 cm)

🌻 Why You’ll Love This Project:

Hilarious Contrast: The juxtaposition of snarky, subversive text with a sweet woodland scene makes this the ultimate conversation starter.

Chart Friendly: Designed with clean, flat blocks of solid color and absolute high clarity, making it an absolute joy to count and stitch on your favorite Aida fabric.

Relaxing Project: A highly satisfying single-chart project packed with adorable details that will keep you smiling (and laughing) as you stitch.

📂 You Will Receive:
A comprehensive digital kit compatible with printing and digital tracking apps:
✔️ PDF — Color cross stitch chart (Symbols over Color blocks)
✔️ PDF — B&W symbol cross stitch chart (High contrast for easy printing)
✔️ SVG — Large symbols-only layout
✔️ SVG — Color version for customization
✔️ PDF — Pattern Keeper & Markup R-XP compatible files for digital tracking

⚠️ PLEASE NOTE:
DIGITAL PRODUCT: This listing is for digital files only. No physical fabric, thread, or kit will be shipped to you.
INSTANT DOWNLOAD: Your files will be available immediately after purchase via your Etsy account.


Cross Stitch Chart, Subversive Stitch, Dark Humor Pattern, Funny Sarcastic Art, Snarky Cross Stitch, Fucked Up Time, Woodland Animal, Cute Girl Pattern, Vintage Folk Art, Meme Cross Stitch, Counted Stitch Chart, Nature Landscape, Craft PDF

  • Designed by
    ONESEO
  • Use
    Supplies for making crafts
  • Item type
    Digital download
  • Digital file type(s)
    3 PDF, 2 other files
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Meet your seller

ONESEO
Firda Habiibillah
ONESEO ·

Oklahoma, United States

We calculate this number using a recency-weighted average of all ratings, with a rating's value decreasing by half each year to best reflect the current experience. 4.9
·
10.2k sales
·
2.5 years on Etsy

Usually responds in a few hours

Speedy replies Has a history of replying to messages quickly.

Rave reviews Average review rating is 4.8 or higher.

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Listed on Oct 8, 2026
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